Bank holiday Blues!
And what did you do on Bank Holiday Dad?
Well, for a start I ended up in hospital. And for a finish I came home from hospital. Why, what did you get up to?
My little excursion to the hospital was necessary. You see, I had blinded myself, accidently of course. What happened was, ?I was out working in the garden as it was such a beautiful day and there was lots needed done. I thought to myself, hmmmmm. The grass needs cut at the back. It is getting too long. I know. I will get the strimmer out. The petrol strimmer with that feckin' two stroke engine on it, (I hate feckin' two stroke engines)and strim the grass to a more manageable length to take the mower over it.
But, I need to mix some fuel for it. Let's see. Ah yes, the 40-1 mix should do it. Mix, mix, mix. Pour, pour, pour, drop, bounce, splash up, scream, scream etc. etc.
I had blinded myself with fuel. As i was filling the tank on the strimmer the machine slipped out of my hand. It hit the deck and bounced up and the fuel bounced even higher, right into my face, and my eyes. This is where I blinded myself folks. I screamed. I screamed blue murder. I effed and blinded, no pun now, and screamed more. I got my hanky out to cover my eyes and effed and blinded some more. (I forgot, I had just blown my nose). i stumbled my way to the house screaming more as the fuel was burning its way into my eyeballs.(or eyeball as it turned out to be as the fuel only got into one eye).
Screamed and effed for my wife who came running. Eyewash or water or both, QUICKLY.
Lunchtime. Back soon
Back again. Now, where was I? Oh yeah. QUICKLY. Got eye wash, water, damp cloth, damp kitchen roll, bowl . I washed my eyes out as best I could. (it was difficult to tell whether it was eyewash going into the bowl or my tears of agony) My wife phoned the hospital and eventually got through. She explained what had happened and they told her to wash the eye out with water. DUH! By this time my eye was really on fire. It felt as though i had a red hot something going into it by this time. The hospital told my wife to bring me over just in case. In case of what? I asked. We went over and signed in and was told to wait. By this time my eye didn't hurt as much but it was still 'uncomfortable' to say the least.
Anyway, got seen to, (by a very helpful and nice nurse who was very good at what she does and I can never understand why drunks and druggies and distraught morons want to keep attacking these people. Sorry. I ranted a bit there. Something I feel very strongly about. Attacks on nurses, not the ranting that is.
Got home with an antiseptic cream to put in my eye 4 times a day for the next 4 days. No more pain (as they had frozen my eye so the could flush Lough Neagh through it to clean it up (it was actually 1 litre of saline but it seemd like more)
By this time my Bank Holiday was more or less over.
I think I will get somebody in to cut the feckin' grass
I can only blame the weather. It was soooo good yesterday that i thought about cutting the grass. Just think, if it had been bad or wet or something I could have stayed indoors and looked at THE BOOTS all day on the internet.
Any comments (structual, of course) click on the title above
Ta ta
Posted :: Tuesday 5/27/2008 5:23:00 AM
Conjugate the verb.....
Go back to your school days a wee moment. Think of being in Primary School with your beloved / behated p/s teech. Now. Conjugate the verb HACK
I hack
You hack
The hack
We hack
You hack
They hack
Good. Now. Shout out as loud as you can. All at once.
Whoever is / was responsible for hacking into our web site you are a total FECKER
Yes folks. We were hacked. Hence the missing few days and bits of topsy turvey goings on with the web site. Being hacked is no fun. Although, someone in my past memory told me once that to be hacked into was a compliment. It meant that whoever the fecker was, sorry, hacker was they felt that our site was a challenge to them due to its fantastic programme. FECK!!
If it ever comes to my attention who this fec....hacker was there will be a strong battle of words. eg. You FECKER.
I now have the pleasurable task of updating stuff for the site. I also have a new idea for our site. Not really a new idea. Not even my idea. Something that I saw on my trip to London at a friends house. I am going to see if I can adapt it for our site. Watch this space. It might happen. It might not. I have to watch what I do with it as it might have copyright issues. I don't know yet.
A message for Avid Reader. I have now found the boots on the internet. I may yet buy them. They are even cheaper than they are in the shop. I would give you the url but I can't bear the thought of somebody wearing my boots. As for the Americhic. I am awaiting judgment from Paypal as to who is right and who is wrong. I know I am in the right. I am always in the right. (unless my wife tells me otherwise)
I will go now to start uploading new gack for 'the pleasure of your eyes only'. Who said I couldn't write the next James bond movie. There's a title for it already. It could be based around the baddie. eg The Americhic vs Those FBI (Those Feckin' British & Irish)
Let me see. James walks into .... and so on. It will end with James being victorious. Who could play the role of James? Mmmmmmm I know. ME!
Yes, that would work. Me as the star. The Americhic as the baddie. Me as the writer / Author / Major Shareholder / Biggest Pay Cheque Me me me me..... STOP! Getting a bit carried away there. Let's wait and see what the outcome is before I start writing my blockbuster.
Any comments. You know where to write to (click on the title for you newcomers to this gack)
Dond, James Dond
Posted :: Friday 5/23/2008 3:29:00 AM
Busy,busy,busy
Yes. Very busy indeed. Over the last week or two the weather here has been glorious. So glorious in fact, I have ventured outside to the garden. Not to laze about (I wish) but to get it into some sort of order so that I can laze about in it. Up to now I have managed to get the front garden looking respectable. Only the flowerbeds to weed out. At the back, the important part of the garden, I have power hosed the deck, put out the garden furniture, erected the gazebo, cut half of the lawn and even climbed onto the roof of the conservatory and power hosed all the green gacky stuff that has accumulated there. Not bad for me.
I am off to London tomorrow now for a long weekend with the mates who live over there. Hence the need to get all that work done.
You may remember at the end of March, when I decided to give up work, I was told by my boss that there would be a secret surprise party held in my honor sometime in April. April came and went. No party. I thought maybe that the surprise was that they would have a secret party without me. Then, out of the blue, I get a phone call from my ex boss last Wednesday. He wanted to know how things were with me and was I enjoying my retirement etc. etc. Then just as the call was coming to an end he said that the secret surprise party would be this coming Friday. I'm glad he told me. I was planning to go to London last week, hence me going this week. It turned out to be very nice and the MD of the organization got up and said some very nice things about me followed by my ex boss sitting and saying some very nice things about me followed by me standing there like a beetroot never having had so much greatness thrown at me in such a short space of time. After my face returned to its normal yellowy palour I managed to stutter out a few words of how I liked working with everyone and meeting so many people from all over the world. They had had a collection in my nam,e and, knowing I am going on a cruise next month, presented me with an envelope full of Euro. How many Euro, I am not telling. You might think less of me if I told you the amount. I wouldn't want any of you thinking less of me now, would I?
Two weeks ago I put a wants ad in the local paper looking for old 7" vinyl records from the 50's and 60's. Well, the amount of replies I got was encouraging to say the least. As for the intelligence of the callers. That beggers belief. I put in the add what I was looking for and what region I was in. I didn't get a single call from the area I specified. They were all from areas of the country that were too far to travel to. The ones I did travel to turned out to be a waste of time. As a record collector of many years I know what I am looking for and what to look for. One man I went to told me how perfect his record were and what era they covered. I only went on his word. As soon as I saw the boxes and boxes of records sitting there I knew it was a waste of time. He certainly had plenty to choose from. The problem was, they all had stickers on the labels or writing on the labels or the covers were ripped or written on . This man was really trying his hardest to persuade me to buy them. I said to him that the record itself was good but to a collector they were all useless. I was, of course, my usual diplomatic self.(?) I think in future I will have to be a lot more specific when advertising for these things.
I sell on Ebay. I buy on Ebay. I now have a battle going on on Ebay.
What happened was, I sold an item to this 'person' in America. She received the item. It was not as described on the page on Ebay. After swapping emails I agreed to give her a full refund as the mistake in the description was my fault. Not happy with that she makes a BIG thing about it and goes to the Ebay equivelent of ombudsman. At the moment the battle is ongoing. I have offered a full refund but the merichic is still not happy. I have left it that I am not paying anymore and that I am on my holidays until next week. The moral of this story is, Feck em!
Looking forward to any comments. Just click on the title above
Cheers
Posted :: Tuesday 5/13/2008 1:09:00 PM
